Happy Ending

4:30pm. 15 minutes early for paperwork. 15 minute drive. 4:00pm. I have to leave the gym by 2:30pm in order to get home, shower and leave by 4:00pm. 3:55pm to be safe. Shit.

I like to make sure I’m never late.

Today I had my very first massage, at 4:30pm. It was fucking glorious. I was nervous and a bit warm. Do I get undressed? How much do I tip? Do I keep my socks on? Fuck. I shaved for this? I hope I still smell good. UGH. The guys weird, damnit I should have requested a woman. No, she would judge my rolls (I GO TO THE GYM EVERY GOD DAMN DAY). I wore underwear and they’re up my ass. I never wear underwear. Hmm… 90 minutes is a really long time to lay still and not talk. I think I have to pee. Oh God, someone knocked. ANSWER!

“Yes, I’m ready!” – I went the naked route and boy am I regretting it.

SWEET BABY JESUS! That is his dick on my thigh. Oh no, no no no. Opps just his arm. Everything is fine.

87 minutes later I wake up feeling like fucking gold. I’ve never in my entire life had a better nap or felt more relaxed in my life. My back doesn’t hurt for the first time in 9374628 years.

God is good. See ya next week Brendon.

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